This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
...so i touched it.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
Randomize
