dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
