you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
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On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
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How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
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