Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
worst night to have a conscience
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
Randomize
