I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
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she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
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Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
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