Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
lets start a swedish sibling band together
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
