Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize
