So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
