Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Randomize
