she looked like the bat from fern gully.
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
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