I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
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