afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
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