Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize