Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
Randomize