I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
no you cant smoke seaweed
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
Randomize
