Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Randomize
