Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
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