You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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