I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Randomize
