ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
we should paint friendship bongs
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