I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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