oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
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