Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Randomize
