check it out our google latitudes are spooning
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize
