those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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