I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
I just found puke in my bra..
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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