i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
I wannas sexs uuuuu
he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
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