i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Randomize
