1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
