Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize