I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
