I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
I had to cum in my sink.
Randomize
