Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
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My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
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