I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
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