I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
well you can't waste a boner
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
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