I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
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