Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
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