I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
i know! what is this dateline?
Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
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Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
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Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is