He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
this just has baby written all over it
27 People Confess The Worst Jobs They’ve Ever Had
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
25 People Confess Their Terrifying Stalker Stories
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?