Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
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I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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