Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
Randomize
