um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
Randomize
