physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
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