I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
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