You can't motorboat a personality
Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
Randomize
