Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Randomize