Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
