I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
