I think my vagina is haunted
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Randomize