discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
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